All healed up and nowhere to go!

So, I went back to work on Thursday and worked until Saturday. I have to say its very anti climatic. I feel like sometimes when you suffer through things, for example a really hard workout, or studying hard for school there is normally this big pay off. However in my case, after suffering for a few days in pain and trying to get back to normal, there's nothing really remarkable about it. Life goes on, work goes on and nothing stops just because you are sick for a few days. Don't get me wrong I love sleeping in my own bed and being able to grocery shop and do the laundry but theres something strange about the whole transition. I guess there's no award for spending a week in the hospital! I think there should be! Just like the MTV music awards except people would be awarded for overcoming obstacles. Might not draw a lot of viewers hey? In other news I had a physical today, I got my ears, nose, throat, blood pressure, temperature, breasts and eyes checked and I am happy to report that besides having a mass in my abdomen I am perfectly healthy so that is great news. I've been trying not to get too stressed out and trying to rest as much as possible but thats sometimes hard to do with work as I am a bit behind from being off for a few days. Also, I am anxious about getting back to the gym but I will have to wait another week for that. In the meantime I will continue to rest and do my best to keep up.

Fallout

So, I spent 6 days in the hospital and now I am home safe and sound end of story. I wish it was that simple I really do. Even though the crisis is over and the internal bleeding has stopped I still have a small mass of blood hanging out in my abdomen which is still a bit painful and after spending six days in a hospital bed my energy level is very low. 

Also, I just missed a week of work which really bothers me. I've only been working with this company for 5 months so it doesn't look good on my part to be out sick for such a long time. I can just picture the pile of work on my desk waiting for me when I get back.

In terms of medical follow up I am going to see my gynecologist in a few weeks. The suggestion has been made that I take a medication called Lupron. The idea behind it is will cause my body to think it's going through menopause. AGAIN. Yes I am 28 years old and have already been through menopause and I am not looking forward to going through it again. Hot flashes, mood swings not what I thought I'd be going through at 28. I should be picking out baby names and buying maternity clothes!

Anyways, hopefully the medication will shut everything down and stop my ovaries from producing cysts. I am worried about it however because it can cause problems with bone density and things like that, so we may look at adding hormones back in so that it will minimize the side effects.

Another thing that I can't get out of my head is the treatment I received at the hospital, it was awful. First of all, I registered to see the doctor at 7 p.m. I did not get my blood transfusion until 2 a.m. I sat in the emergency room for seven hours, crying and wiggling around in pain. I feel like if I would of got seen at the hospital quicker, I would not have bled internally as much and would not of needed as much plasma and have a quicker recovery time.

I am on so many committees and with the primary goal of making Hemophilia Care better and obviously this goal is not being met.

So now I am in emergency, my nurse comes in to give me some morphine for pain, she pulls out a syringe and inserts it into my IV before she pushes the morphine in, she notices that its the wrong one so she takes it out, leaves the room and returns with another one. She puts in into my IV and before she insert it I look and notice the name on it says "Tanya" so I say I'm not Tanya, she says oops, removes the syringe and returns with the third one which finally says Ryanne Radford. I get the medication and start feeling a bit of relief from the pain. I look up at Zane and he is just horrified when he questions the nurse she says "it's hard to keep everyone straight." Now I don't know what your feelings about our health care system is like, maybe you think it's great because it's Free or at least better than other countries but in my opinion it's not good enough.

A few days later I have another mishap. My nurse comes in and hangs a bag of what I thought and what was suppose to be Benedryl. I get benedryl before each blood transfusion because I have had serious life threatening reactions to plasma. I am beginning to feel very drowsy and and I feel different than I did all the other times so I pull my IV poll in closer and read the bag and it says GRAVOL not BENADRYL. My nurse comes in and says that an error was made and now shes gonna give me my benadryl so leaves. I am so upset so I stop my IV and page the nurse. I tell her that I am not proceeding until I talk to a doctor and the charge nurse. She starts the IV up again and leaves. I stop the IV and wait for her to come back she comes back and says to me you have to stop touching the IV machine you are not trained to use it and I'm thinking I'm not trained? you just gave me the wrong medication!

Anyways I politely say look I've been doing this a long time, I want a new nurse and I want to see a doctor. The worst part about this situation is not the fact that I got gravol because that part is not a huge deal but the bad part is that I was at risk for having a reaction because I didn't get my benedryl before hand.

Anyways my point is this, is this acceptable? As a Hemophiliac as a Canadian as a human being, I don't think that this is something we should put up with.

What I would like to know from my readers (I hope you are out there) What should I do? Should I file a formal complaint? Should I keep my mouth shut? Honestly, after everything I've been through I don't know how I can let this go.

Thank God i found u

So, I have to say there is something peaceful about the hospital at night. The sound of my roomates snoring to lull me to sleep, my IV pump doubling as a night light and the running water sound soothing me from the oxygen mask on the patient next to me. Not to mention the three different containers of urine that are sitting on the bathroom floor which make my stomach turn everytime I go in there and I don't even
Need to tell you what it smells like
It here. It's been very hard over the past few days but it was nice to see Zane and Dad in my room today after I awoke from
My drug induced nap! They have always been so
Supportive of me through everything, even when I phone them twonor three times a day saying I'm plannng on escaping from the hospital. I am grateful for so many things in my life bur lately I feel like my life is one big medical episode and I'm scrambling in between to
Have a life for myself. On Wednesday when I was in emergency the man next to me who was suffering from a bowel obstruction cried out in pain I wish I was never born and I thought to myself I hear ya buddy. It's hard to be in intense pain for several hours it starts to mess with your head. Either way, I was born and all I can do is take it one day at a time!

L

Test

So I think when you go to the hospital they try to torture you as much as possible until you leave! I honestly think that's the action plan for the hospital! I came in on Wednesday and since then I have had 12 units of blood, 4 bags of benedryl, 5 ivs, and 6 needles for blood work. If that's not enough to upset you my nurse comes in to tell me I'm moving so she moves me into this too
With two lady's and some man. I don't feel comfortable and I know I'm about to freak out so I page my nurse this lady comes in and is like who are you? You aren't suppose to be here? So
I am going to get my transfusions every day but go home in between!

Mass

So, I came to the foothills hospital last night around 7 pm with severe abdominal pain. After about 3 hours of crying and wailing I received morphine which i didn't find was helping very much. After my four units of fresh frozen plasma I started to feel a bit better! Today a ct scan revealed a mass in my stomach which is mist likely fluid or blood. I'm still in a lot of pain and I feel really guilty for missing work. I also feel bad for Zane because I know watching me in so much pain is hard on him too! He took the day off with me to get some clothes for me and all that stuff. My friends cheryl and Kim also came to visit and bought me the most beautiful bouquet of flowers! My morphine is kicking in
So I can't write much more but I am in a lot of pain, I'm tired and I frustrated that my life is like this.

Hemophilia Today

So, the lastest issue of Hemophilia Today came out so I thought I would take this opportunity to to encourage you to read it. It's a great publication and I'm not just saying that because my picture is in it three times! When you get a minute take a look at http://www.hemophilia.ca/files/HT%20August%202011%20-%20final%20web.pdf.

Kidney Trouble

So, I've been having some kidney problems over the past week or so. After taking Antibiotics for almost a week I found myself in a lot of pain on Thursday evening so I went to the emergency room which I think really speaks to the amount of pain I was in because I only go to the emergency room when I am over come with pain. Zane and I sat in the waiting room for about two hours then sat in the triage room, then back to the waiting room then I got a bed and waited there. After about 4 hours Zane went home and went to bed and I decided it was a good a time as any to have an emotional break down. I cosed my curtain and cried tobreak my heart. I cried because I was in pain and frustrated with the medical system, I cried because of what I have to put Zane through and I cried because I miss Charlie. 

Right in the middle of my break down my nurse came and pumped me full of Fentayl and a porter whisked me away to get a CT scan. 

There's nothing worse then being upset and then having to face people. They looked a me as I wheeled by in the stretcher probably thinking, what the hell is wrong with her? or that is the most black makeup streaked across someones face I have ever saw.

Anyways after a few hours of waiting the doctor poked his head in and told me that the CT scan showed not only that I had a kidney infection but also kidney stones.

I don't know what to say, I wasn't shocked I guess. The infection will pass, but I'm now thinking about whats to be done with the stones?

I hear they can laser them to make them smaller making them easier to pass, however I've talked to some other Hemophiliacs who told me about how that caused them a lot of bleeding. So I guess in the grand scheme of things it's not a big deal but I just feel like it's one more thing for me to worry about like am i going to have a bleed? am I going to have a gallstone attack? will the kidney stones cause me any problems? It'sjust really frustrating. But I guess all we can do is hope for the best and pray for good health!

Kidney Infection

So, I thought I would take a minute and write about my Kidney Infection. Saturday night I started to feel like I was having symptoms of a Urinary Tract Infection so I tested my urine and it tested positive for Blood and Leukocytes. I began taking antibiotics and started to feel a bit better. Monday night I started to feel a little sick and began throwing up on Tuesday. After visit the doctor on Wednesday she told me that I in fact had a Kidney Infection which can be very serious if left untreated. She prescribed stronger antibiotics and told me to drink lots of fluids. The thing about a kidney infection is that it can become serious so if you are experiencing any of the following symptoms be sure to see a doctor right away, frequent urination, pain when urinating, pain in groin, pain in lower back, cold chills, sweats, stomach pain. I will be on antibiotics for the next 10 days so hopefully by then I will be feeling 100%. Until then I will complain and drink my lemon water and cranberry juice!