Monday, October 31, 2011

Hope

So, as you know I am suppose to be getting ready for my sisters wedding. Today is my day off and I am suppose to be going for a spray tan, getting my nails and packing up for my first trip to Las Vegas to see my darling sister get married. But instead I am making pros and cons lists and frantically calling insurance companies to see if there is anyone who will cover me. Despite everything, I still have hope. It's a funny thing about hope i find it nearly impossible to get rid of. No matter what people tell me I still have hope that things will work out for me that things will go well. Now is one of the times that I wish I could shake it. If I could just get rid of the want and desire and hope of going to my sisters wedding then I could move on with my life, focus on going back to work, focus on taking Zane to  the knee specialist today but instead I have this hope in my heart that will not let go of the possibility of going to Kelli's wedding. I guess hope is one of the only things that keep us going, without it I'm sure I would be curled up in a ball somewhere crying inconsolably. I guess when I run out of hope I know I will really be in trouble. As for now I'll just wait and see. 

1 comment:

  1. I know it's a terrible thing to have to miss something because of a bleeding episode. I lost count as to how many times that has happened to me in my life, and like you, I never gave up hope that in the end it would work out and I'd get to do it. I hope that you end/ended up able to go. If you need help with backup treatment options if you're stateside, I'd be happy to help out where I can.

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